It’s not much of a gig for Myles Park (Steve Vanderzee) being the opening act for a Hollywood sell-out trying to return to his stand-up roots to prove he is more than just a guy making bad movies for the money. But it takes place in a real theater and that sure beats telling jokes […]
The Faceless Man is a confusing mess. The first 10 minutes feel like a high school theater production of an angst-filled father/daughter melodrama that takes place in the middle of a crowded cancer ward. It’s badly acted, badly written, and almost bad enough to make you stop watching altogether. But please don’t. When the action […]
The body of a teenage girl is found washed up by the banks of a river. Police arrive, look around for a bit and deduce that she wasn’t just killed. She had been hunted. It’s unclear how they leap to this conclusion given the minimal investigation, but it’s still just the opening minutes of The […]
It’s been a long time since Michael Wolffsen (Tyler Mane) has been back to the family compound, and it’s not because his life away from home has been so fabulous he didn’t have time to look back. If anything he’s spent all those years obsessing over what he left behind, always worrying that someone or […]
A weekend retreat at an isolated cabin in the woods. What could possibly go wrong? It’s a bit of a rhetorical question since the old ‘cabin in the woods’ trope has been used to make dozens and dozens of horror movies, whether it’s a group of cabins at a summer camp (Friday the 13th) or […]
Let’s start with the fact that Baby Frankenstein is not, by any stretch of the imagination, a horror movie. Yes, it has a ‘monster’ in it and there is a bad guy that you want to see murdered in the most grisly and gory way imaginable. But nobody dies in Baby Frankenstein; nobody even gets […]
An apocalyptic event has taken place leaving David (Tim Kaiser) alone in the woods with little more than a pocket knife, a few meager supplies, and a battered old tent. As if that wasn’t bad enough there are things, evil things, waiting just outside the tent to get him the minute he lets his guard […]
A coven of four young witches seeks to recruit a fifth as part of a late-night ritual to summon a demon from their past. So they gather in a candle-lit circle in a spooky ruin and offer a blood sacrifice. The original four get a small cut and bleed a little; the new girl gets […]
A pair of sisters head off into a cabin in the woods, armed only with a video camera and a suspiciously muscular psychic to try and contact the spirit of an old boyfriend, a soldier who they think was killed in Iraq although his body was never found. That’s the basic premise of Dead Voices, […]
Homewrecker, as the title suggests, is the story of one woman wrecking the homelife of another. To do this, director Zach Gayne uses all the tricks at his disposal: psychological manipulation, physical abuse, adultery, and, in this particular case, a pair of really sharp scissors. What he doesn’t use, though, is any sense of subtlety. […]
It starts on a bizarre note. A man and a woman are running for their lives through the woods, pursued by a killer wearing wrestling boots. The man is dressed in black shorts and a black t-shirt, like a pale goth guy heading to the beach. The woman is naked, except for her combat boots. […]
Three young women are on their way to a concert of heavy metal music. On the way, they stop at a convenience store for some junk food and an ominous warning from the old man behind the counter. Back on the road, a mysterious van passes them on a lonely stretch of backroad and the […]
The title is the best thing about Ouija Shark. It’s everything the movie is not: it’s clever, it’s funny and it makes you want more. The poster is kind of cool, too, and the tagline — Gonna Need a Bigger Board — is a groaner, but not in a terrible way. Everything else about Ouija […]
A wanna-be playwright and his young bride accept an invitation to an exclusive dinner party at the palatial home of a wealthy recluse hoping he will agree to back the writer’s latest play. They don’t know the man…or any of the other guests that will be attending the party. They just know that the last […]
Charles Bronson and Leatherface get into a fight. What sounds like a cheap joke or a bad meme is really just Cry Havoc, a cheap, bad movie written, directed, edited and shot by Rene Perez (The Punished) that features a Charles Bronson impersonator named Robert Bronzi as the hero and a joke shop Leatherface wannabe […]